Half-way through my GP-rotation and the honeymoon period is definitely behind me. I never expected my GP-rotation to be so exhausting. This is really due to my main GP supervisor, who is just...so... mean! Today I cracked it. Today she made me cry. I'm too exhausted to write about in great lengths; she is simply just so exhausting! I wrote to the clinical supervisor/mentor of my home-base hospital asking for help:
I hope you're well. I'm half-way through my GP rotation and wanted to raise a concern I had with one of my mentors. I have several GP supervisors that I work with in the practice - all of them are really wonderful and I love working with and learning from them. My main mentor, Dr X, however, is really quite harsh and strict. Her feedback is extremely helpful - don't get me wrong - she gives great advice about what you need to know to fill gaps in your knowledge; but her approach and mannerisms are quite destructive. If she asks a question and you don't know the answer, she pulverises you in front of the patient and makes you feel like a failure. I don't know if I'm just a little soft in that regard, but some of my experiences with her have been extremely stressful and quite frankly, just downright hurtful. I've been too scared to say anything to her about it because, all things standing, I think she means well and it's certainly not personal. On the contrary, I have thanked her for her feedback and am doing my best to remedy these gaps in my knowledge. But I still feel really upset about her demeaning approach and I'm not sure what to do. I know we're half-way through and if I can disregard any of my personal response to her approach, there is a lot to be gained from the wisdom she is offering. I was wondering if you can offer me any advice on how to approach this situation? I really want to learn from her; but at the same time I don't want to go home crying every night.
Thanks for you support,
Miss Purple Stethoscope
She replied straight away and told me she'd call me tomorrow to have a chat about it. Very, very grateful for her support; but still feeling stressed-out that this chat will come after a day spent with Dr X and God knows what sort of damage she'll have done to me by then. Thinking of having a mental health day tomorrow, but also feel deep down that it will be like admitting defeat. I know it seems excessive, but I've been tipped over the edge. And I'm a fairly tolerant person... if that's saying anything...
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